DrCrafty on DeviantArthttps://www.deviantart.com/drcrafty/art/AT4W-Catwoman-Guardian-of-Gotham-NO1-322096221DrCrafty

Deviation Actions

DrCrafty's avatar

AT4W: Catwoman - Guardian of Gotham NO1

By
Published:
5.6K Views

Description

I can't help but think all elseworld comic stories should begin witht he futurama cast at the what if machine.

:icongoodnewsplz::iconsaysplz: What if Catwoman was the hero instead of Batman?

I however have a better question for an elseworld story.

:icongoodnewsplz::iconsaysplz: What if comics reviewed Linkaras?

£6213/£8500

Buy a commission from me, details here:



[link] [link] [link] [link] [link]
Image size
2000x884px 664.4 KB
© 2012 - 2024 DrCrafty
Comments53
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Ecclytennysmithylove's avatar
Memorable quotes from episode 203:


Linkara: "Despite popular folklore associating cats with witchcraft or something, the truth is, nobody's really all that afraid of cats. A cat is not some dark, terrible creature of the night that will strike fear in the superstitious criminal mind. I think "Catwoman being Gotham's protector", and this is what is conjured up..."
Ash!Catwoman: "Eehh, I'm the hero Gotham deserves, but not what it needs... cuz I'm lazy. Heh, heh-heh-heh."
-----
Linkara: "We open at midnight in Gotham City, and the Cat-Signal is on, and it looks just as terrifying there as it does on the cover. It's like the moon is getting ready to eat us!"
Narrator: "In the wake of a simple crime with hidden depths, distant light slashes blackness, becoming a bizarre symbol and signal."
Linkara: "The symbol and the signal was also a sigil."
Narrator: "Responding to this silent call is the strange, sleek figure sworn to protect all the city's midnights."
Linkara (as narrator): "1AM can go straight to Hell, however."
-----
Linkara: "Catwoman is in the sewer and comes across the sack the criminal used, but she's suddenly attacked from the water by Killer Croc. And, oh, lookie, I was right; 90-degree spinal movement and the center of mass for bending over is at her ass! Man, it's a good thing that human bodies carry all their mass in their legs, or else this might look awkward or something. She tries to reach for her whip, but gets knocked aside by the massive being. He says he needs the money for an operation to fix his reptilian appearance. Dude, you're like fifteen feet tall, you've got a giant crocodile head, what appear to be spikes on parts of you... I think you're gonna need more than one operation. Catwoman tries to get him to surrender, but he just roars..."
Killer Croc: "SHUT UP!"
Linkara: "Her response? Rope up his jaw and proclaim..."
Catwoman: "You shut up!"
Linkara: "Ooh, burn. Catwoman has the wit of a nine-year-old." 
Linkara (as Killer Croc): "Shut up!"
Linkara (as Catwoman): "You shut up!"
Linkara (as Killer Croc): "No! You shut up!"
Linkara (as Catwoman): "You win this round..."
-----
Linkara: "After she battles her way through several of them, including one guy who has spike-filled cream pies, so points for originality there, she charges through a doorway to discover the Joker murdered, and guess who's standing over him!"
Catwoman: "You... You murdered him... just like Killer Croc! Who are you?"
Batman: "Figure it out. If you're the Catwoman, then I'm--"
Linkara (as Batman): "Possum Man!"
Catwoman: "A... BAT-man."
Batman: "The Batman."
Linkara: "Oh, my God! You're the Batman?! Can I get your autograph?!"
Catwoman: "You didn't have to kill him."
Batman: "But I did."
Catwoman: "It's murder."
Batman: "And because of it, he'll never bray at the moon again."
Linkara: *confused* "The Joker was a werewolf? She tries to grab him, using her whip, but Batman is easily able to cut it with his serrated Batarang, and then leap out of a tall building. Wait, what? Look at this, they're in a tower now! How big was this friggin' abandoned comedy club?! They're like fifty stories up now!"
Mike Nelson: "Space is warped and time is bendable."
-----
Linkara: "Later, Batman sneaks into Selina Kyle's mansion to steal stuff, but unwittingly comes across the Cat-Cave's entrance. Naturally, it has no other security features; it's just a switch that opens up behind a painting."
Batman: *thinking* "What in the name of...? Computer station... state of the art... targeted on me..."
Linkara (as Batman): "My God, it's a fan Tumblr!"
Batman: *thinking* "Unbelievable... But there's no other explanation."
Linkara (as Batman): "Selina Kyle... is Superman!"
-----
Linkara: "Commissioner Gordon puts together a map of where Batman has struck and where it's likely he'll strike again, and Catwoman goes to stake it out for a few nights, finally spotting him escaping with some loot. They fight and exchange banter, Batman claiming he's superior because he's bigger and stronger, but Catwoman is faster."
Batman: "You're fast-- but size beats speed every time!"
Catwoman: "Really? Tell it to Bruce Lee!"
Linkara (as Catwoman): "Then tell it to his clones!"
Catwoman: "Or Sugar Ray."
Linkara: *singing to Sugar Ray's "Someday"* Music "Someday... when my life has passed me by... I'll lay around and wonder why Catwoman karate-chopped Batman..." Music  *shrugs* "Well, to be fair, I was confused by this originally, but really, she's referencing not one, but two boxers, Sugar Ray Leonard and Sugar Ray Robinson, both known for being incredibly fast. You can imagine my initial confusion, however, since the band Sugar Ray is not exactly known for its speedy fighting prowess." *singing to Sugar Ray's "Every Morning"* Music "Something so deceiving... When you stop believing... Punch me in the face..."Music 
Batman: "All right... first blood to you."
Gomez Addams: "One for you, Tully."
Linkara: "Batman manages to Brute Force through Selina until knocking her off a ledge. She grabs onto his arm enough to draw blood."
Batman: "Do you really think I care about that glove? Hah! I'd give my right HAND to be rid of you!"
Linkara: "Aaaand he proceeds to cut off his glove so much he starts bleeding from it, causing her to fall. Uh, how loose was that glove on your hand, dude? That should not have done anything but hurt yourself. You'd have to actually cut off your hand for that to work. Not that you'd really need to anyway. If you're so good at throwing your Batarang from a distance to kill someone with it, maybe you ought to just throw it at her head! And so, our comic ends with Catwoman yelling..."
Catwoman: "FALLING!"
Linkara: "Well, thanks for narrating the blindingly obvious, Selina... REVIEWING A HORRIBLE COMIC!"